Day 108: The End is Near

My wife discontinued with the 150mg 5-HTP (5-Hydroxytryptophan) a couple weeks ago and is now taking only 150mg Zoloft.  At my persistent nagging, she has decided to go adjust her sleep hygeine so that she goes to bed closer to midnight.  She still wakes up occasionally at 430-5am, but the majority of the time is able to fall back asleep.  The one remaining symptom of her anxiety disorder is the muscle tension that she still complains about, but even that she admits has improved.  However, all of her other symptoms (insomnia, heart racing, excess sweating, low energy, depressed mood) are pretty much gone.
She had previously tried CBT with a therapist, but it did not help, as her case was unique:  she did not feel mentally stressed, nor emotionally anxious, and yet showed all the physical symptoms of anxiety disorder.  There was no specific set of circumstance nor set of thoughts which would trigger the anxiety symptoms, it would occur randomly.  Google has helped us to find alternative ways to treat her unique situation.  One thing that did help was sleep hygiene, and also progressive relaxation techniques.  But in my opinion, I gave her as much emotional and moral support as I could best muster, and I think that also made a difference.  One thing that I found pleasantly strange was that we were not very affectionate to each other after we got married, but while she was going through this time of trial, she gave obvious body language and other signs of wanting to be hugged.  I later read that hugging can be therapeutic. I can say there was lots of hugging in the past 100 days.  Ooohhh yeeaaah.  But now she is showing less signs of wanting to be hugged, which is also how I know that she is getting better.
Yeah, I am going to miss giving out those hugs.

Journey to the Destination, Part II

During my Maritimes vacation, it finally dawned on me that my dad is old. As in seniors care home old.

As recently as 5 years ago, my Dad was active, talkative, bossy, ignorant, and had a fiery temper. I remember how he used to argue vehemently with my mom, with my sister, and even at me sometimes.  He isn't a selfish person because he worked very hard to provide for his family, and sacrificed his career so that my sister and I could have a brighter future. However, I would not describe him as a very self-aware person either, because that is the underlying reason to explain why he got into arguments with all his family members.  But he is who he is, and I didn't get a choice on who my father would be.
As recently as last year, we went on a family trip to Las Vegas, and he was more than able to keep up with us when we toured Las Vegas and also the Grand Canyon.

But then earlier this year something happened to him.  He was walking in his home when he fell down for no reason.  The next time it happened, he fainted.  My mom rushed him to Emergency at the hospital.  The doctor later told us that he had a mild stroke.  It was quite the surprise to me because he was healthy and showed no prior warning signs.
Luckily, there were no complications and he recovered full use of all limbs.

When I was a young lad, I never had a father who would throw the ball around with me, take me to see hockey games, or even explain to me the ways of the world. But even this twinge of resentment that lingered around in the depths of my mind has disappeared as I watched my dad during this vacation.  It was on this vacation to the Maritimes that I noticed that he is walking noticeably slower now, and talking slightly slower, more subdued nowadays. And more significantly, he no longer shows the fire of his character.
My role now, as it always has been, and always ever shall be, is to play the filial son.

The Glorious Hospitality of Quebec City in a Nutshell

One of the stops in the Maritimes bus tour was Quebec City.  We arrived at the Old Quebec section of the city, behind the wall.  The tour guide gave us 2 hours to walk around the various cobblestone streets and visit all the attractions.  We arrived at the old Quebec section later in the afternoon as we had just finished the whale watching tour.  Naturally, we arrived hungry, so we went to the tourist information centre and asked for directions to the nearest McDonalds.   While eating at the McDonalds, my daughter told us something mildly interesting about the Quebecois locals.  She noticed an old tourist couple walking by and one of them dropped a toonie.  Shortly afterwards, she noticed a young person pick up the toonie and walking off instead of returning it back to the old couple.

We arrived at the Notre Dame de Quebec Basilica Cathedral.  It was nice, and reminded me of Christ Church Cathedral back at my hometown, only a super sized Catholic version.  After walking around inside, we went outside and looked for someone to help us take a family photo, as I didn't particularly enjoy using the selfie stick today.  We saw this middle aged, obese person who seemed to be in a rush to get somewhere.  Nonetheless, I ask this person to help us take a photograph.  Unfortunately, this representative of all that Quebec City has to offer, muttered something to us in Quebecois french, dismissed us without even offering to help, and the continued on past us.  I kept looking at this person turned the corner, and confirmed the person was not busy trying to catch a bus.
This was the first time ever I have been turned down for assistance with taking a photo, what hospitality !

We were walking around and before we knew it it was time to go back to the tour bus.  However my daughter wanted to go the washroom.  Due to some miscommunication, we wound up looking for a washroom for her, which caused us to be late getting back to the bus. The tour guide admonished us for being a mere 5 minutes late getting back to the bus.  The reason being that some city official was threatening to give her a traffic ticket for parking the bus too long in a no parking zone.  So let me get this straight: their city hall could not be bothered to increase their tourism revenues by changing their bylaw to be more accommodating of tour buses to park in designated zones..... Really ?  

That is just awesome, I can't wait for my next vacation to Quebec to experience even more of their warm hospitality!

Journey to the Destination, Part I

I went on a 9 day bus tour of the Maritimes with my extended family.  Sitting on the bus to get to various destinations sucked. But I saw various attractions that helped me to learn a little more about Canadian culture along the way.

The Canadian war museum - located in Ottawa, there are various artifacts and galleries and tanks on display describing Canada's role in the 2 world wars and other wars.  The more interesting exhibition was the one describing Gladiators and Roman soldiers from the ancient Roman Empire.

Hopewell Rock (Bay of Fundy) - This was a beautiful scenic beach that we visited during low tide.  We explored some of the various rock caverns that this park is famous for.

Peggy's Cove - This was a panoramic, post-card like attraction, with the mini-lighthouse and attractive rocky shoreline.  The tour guide for some reason kept promoting this spot and encouraging us to spend some tourist dollars buying various trinkets, which we obliged.

The Atlantic maritime museum - I think the main reason this was chosen as part of the tour was because they had a gallery on display which contained artifacts from the Titanic, some of which were used in the actual movie.  The Titanic was apparently very popular with the Hong Kong people.  There was also a boat that we could board to see what life was like living aboard a boat.

Anne of Green Gables Park - another piece of Canadian culture that we visited.

Magnetic Hill - the bus driver demonstrated the effects of magnetic hill by driving "down" the hill and then putting it into neutral so that we can see the bus slide back "up" the hill.  Magnetic hill is actually an optical illusion where the human eye is tricked into seeing the hill as "downard" when it is actually upward due to no horizon available to use as reference.

Whale Watching (Riviere du Loup) - First time whale watching, and the St Lawrence seaway near Riviere du Loup was a great location.  I was able to see fin whales and minke whales, as well as a bunch of grey seals.

Chinese Buffet dinners - not surprisingly, the buffet dinners more or less served the same kind of westernized Chinese food - chow mein, fried rice, California Rolls, sweet & sour pork, spring rolls, stir fried veggies.  The maritime provinces are not known for their Chinese food unfortunately.  For the ones that tour bus took us to, I think the only reason they even exist is because of the bus tours "feeding" them.  I asked the tour guide, and she told me that there are on average 5 to 6 buses such as the one we were on driving asian tourists out to these destinations 2x per week.  Each bus has a seating capacity of 52 people, so assuming a buffet dinner costs around $15, that works out to $7800 per week of business for these hole in the wall restaurants.  Not too shabby.

lobster dinner - this was the first time I have ever eaten a whole lobster as the main course of the meal.  The whole lobster was steamed and partially cracked to make it easier to access the meat, and came with a baked potato, half a corn on the cob and some rice.  The lobster was not overcooked and tasted great, although the service was disappointing.  I don't think they had any system to deal with a large group such as the tour group I was with.

My son was more interested in swimming, and he got to try out the swimming pools at the Delta Fredericton, Delta Prince Edward (Charlottetown), the Prince George Hotel (Halifax), and Le Gouverneur (Montreal).

Guest Post

Sat.July 25/15

This is the wife and I'm writing to express how I feel today.  For the past 2 weeks, my tension in my lower and upper has settled down a bit, however there is tension building up at the back of my throat.  I hope that it's just anxiety unexpectedly happening without my control.  My husband thinks it is, but sometimes I think it might be something else.  It's so uncomfortable having this feeling and it is creating internal stress within me sometimes.  I try not to think about it and go on with my daily routine, but it's so strong that it's hard not think about it.  I even notice my heart beat within this tension.  I'm hoping the medicine is going to treat it and will go away so I can have my  healthy natural sleep back.